A lot of people make fun of me for the great big planner I carry around with me. In this day and age people tend to use their phones for reminders and electronic calendars, so my old school planner is laughable to some. On the other hand, some people like my planner because it features quotes that can be inspirational, sometimes funny, and some that offer advice. When I wrote down my appointment for my IVF consultation on the calendar I didn’t look at the quote for that week. I turned the page a couple days ago to look at my schedule for work, noting again that my appointment was almost here, and it was at that time that i saw it... the quote for this week. It read: “If not now, when?”. I was so surprised and in shock about the coincidence. It was the most clear sign to me, a huge flashing sign right in front of my face. This is real, this is right, this is now, and I’m going to be a mommy. Funny thing is, I don’t really even believe in signs. I usually just chalk things up to coincidence. But this big sign has converted me into a believer.
I am incredibly excited about my consultation, it’s tomorrow! Every ounce of me is ready to get this process started. I’m finding it difficult to keep my emotions in check. I know I have to achieve a healthy balance of hope, excitement, and reality. I might not be able to sleep tonight, but if I do I know what I'll be dreaming of:)
-Mel
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